Wednesday 17 April 2013

Michael's Taste: Wine.


Hi, everyone. I've decided to give my blog a bit of a shake by introducing an occasional review section that I've decided to call Michael's Taste. In it I'll be reviewing anything and everything from films and movies to your fucked up parents and what's on at the cinema. But today I'm going to be looking at....wine.


Vigne Lourac Mauzac Sauvignon £7.99




Vegan wine to be precise. It's harder than it looks to find any vegan wine when you're out and about, never mind decent vegan wine, so I thought I'd search around and find three bottles to try. They all sound good but, of course, it's "Michael's Taste" you're interested in. 

Let's start with a sauvignon. I'm a big fan of dry white wines so I was really looking forward to trying this and I wasn't disappointed. It's incredibly crisp and full of vibrant fruit flavours that leave such a fresh sensation on the tongue. In fact, the first thing I noticed was that beautiful burst of gooseberry as I let the wine slosh around my mouth. And after I swallowed, was that elderflower? I think it was. Lovely. Basically, what I discovered was the exciting, fresh taste of Spring. Then, by the end of the second glass, I really loved how this appealing tipple made me feel gently numb. I really felt it in my arms at first but near the end of the bottle I could feel my face getting happily numb and warm at the same time. And at just £7.99, I think finishing the bottle and getting that feeling of confidence is well worth it. Confident or not though, I won't be texting her. I don't need to because she's not important anymore. In fact, I don't know why I brought her up. There's still a mouthful left.


Navarrsotillo Rioja Crianza £9.99




Now. Red I'm not always so keen on but I'm certainly not opposed to giving it a try. I have to say straight away that this rioja has a wonderful nose. Smells fucking great. Like Christmas or...I dunno. It's definitely a nice wine with a very strong, warm feeling brought to the face almost immediately but by the second glass it's making my mouth feel dry and chalky, if I'm honest. Hey, speaking of being honest, are we allowed to say what we think of It's Kevin yet? No. No, it is good. It IS good. Love him. Who doesn't love Kevin Eldon? Fucking about time he got a series. I think that's more important than putting on something funny. It is funny. IT IS FUNNY. I didn't mean it wasn't fun. funny. I mean, I just. Ha haaaa! I just think...I just think...I just think that Anna and Katy wouldn't never have gotten a series if it wasn't for the FACT that all accents, apart from theirs, are funny. Don't know why they don't just fucking black up. That's what Lee Nelson does. Yeah, you can black up on the BBC again. Getting on TV and performing is so hard but don't worry, black people, Lee Nelson will do it for you. Fuck's sake. My Radio 4 series got turned down, did I tell you that? Oh, I bet she loved that. I bet she fucking did.


De La Tour Gard Rose £8.99




Thirteen fucking years ago I loaned Rob Rouse £40. That's completely true, that is. We did a gig together in Brighton and I gave him £40 that he said he'd pay back the next day. Has he paid it back? Has he fuck. Thinks I've forgotten? The cunt. He's on the radio now. Why ams I not on the radio?

Carlsberg Special Brew £0.99

I fucking texted her and I fucking told her. I fucking told her straight. Ha ha. Why is my face wet and heart all sore? I shouldn't of drank this.




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